SO WHAT HAPPENED, JOHN?

YOU DON'T CALL.......
YOU DON'T WRITE...........
YOU DON'T SEND FLOWERS.....
WHAT?????????
THE PHONE IS TOO FAR TO REACH?

         BEFORE I BEGIN THE MOST AMAZING WEEKS OF LIVING IN A COFFIN, LET ME EXPLAIN A CONCEPT TO EACH OF YOU WISHING TO
........EXPAND YOUR HORIZONS.................UNDERSTAND THIS WELL

            INANIMATE  OBJECTS...........FROM SAFETY PINS TO HELICOPTERS........................AND EVERY THING IN BETWEEN
..............INANIMATE OBJECTS ARE COGNITIVE OF THEIR SURROUNDINGS AND HAVE THE ABILITY TO ADAPT THOSE SURROUNDINGS  IN ORDER TO SURVIVE.............THUS THE FOLLOWING.........FOR BOTH BELIEVERS AND DISBELIEVES AT THE SAME TIME



         THE BOAT "QUE SERA".........DONATED BY GUY  FALSETTI
         NURSED HOME TO TORONTO IN BOTH FOG, RAIN AND THE COMPLETE ABSENCE OF WIND TAKING 2 AND 1/2 HOURS LONGER WHILE LUIS OF PATAGONIA BOAT WORKS  PACED THE DOCK AND CONSIDERED QUITE OFTEN THE RAMIFICATIONS OF CALLING THE CANADIAN COAST GUARD AS THE HOURS DRIFTED BY,,,,,,,,,AND BY...........AND BY...................( I'M NOT SURE WHICH OF US WERE THE MORE THE HAPPIER AS WE FINALLY VIEWED  THE SAME DOCK)  I WAS SERIOUSLY GLAD TO GET OFF THAT BOAT
AND YET KNOWING THAT IF I CAN'T OVERCOME SUCH A SMALL ?????????????????????????BREACH OF ETIQUETTE.......HERE ON THE PROTECTED WATERS, WHAT AWAITS ME ON THE WILD ONES

                 LUIS PROVED TO BE THE ULTIMATE PROFESSIONAL.......WE HAD DISCUSSED MANY CHANGES TO THE BOAT..........HE UNDERSTOOD EACH OF THEM AND THE COST INVOLVED TO EVOKE EACH OF THE MODIFICATIONS..............AS I REMEMBER............HE GAVE ME A FINAL PRICE ON A PIECE OF PAPER AND I EXCUSED MYSELF AND WENT TO THE TOILET TO THROW UP FOR THE NEXT 15 MINUTES................MAKE THAT 35 MINUTES..........OK......40 MINUTES.....................

                 THIRTY-FIVE HUNDRED DOLLARS BOUGHT THE 3 OF 4 NEW
         FLOORS AND ALL NEW KEEL BOLTS AND ENLARGED SCUPPERS...............THIS WAS THE MAXIMUM I COULD HANDLE, KNOWING THE UPCOMING EXPENSES FOR ELECTRONICS




         THERE IS ONLY ONE PERSON THAT I WOULD TRUST WITH MY LIFE IN THE FIELD OF ELECTRONICS............JIM  HAMMOND
         "HAMMOND MARINE INC."..............JIM HAS A PLAQUE INSTALLED ON A MULTIPLE ATLANTIC TRANSITS.........IT JUST SAYS

                 "THESE ELECTRONICS APPROVED BY JIM HAMMOND"

                         THAT PLAQUE WAS INSTALLED BY THE OWNER,  NOT JIM

         FROM NOW UNTIL
KEN HUCHERSON ARRIVES FROM HOUSTON AS MY CREW TO DELIVER THE BOAT TO NYC DOWN THE CANALS,  I TRY TO REMOVE
         AS MUCH EXCESSIVE  "CRUISING GEAR" AS IS POSSIBLE.

         LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, THERE ARE 3 SIDES TO A  SHARK
                 THE FIRST IS its INTENDED PURPOSE:
                 I CALL IT THE "GET OUT OF MY WAY AND LET ME SHOW YOU WHAT FAST REALLY  MEANS !!!!!! " FOR THOSE RACERS OUT THERE............YOU KNOW THAT SIDE AND CAN'T GET ENOUGH OF IT!

         THE SECOND SIDE IS THE "CRUISING "SIDE.......THE MOST INSIDIOUS OF THEM ALL! IT  CREATES ITSELF ONE ITEM AT A TIME
         THIS BOAT CAME WITH 17 LIFE JACKETS ON BOARD ! IF GUY DIDN'T HAVE AN ITALIAN LAST NAME AND LIVED IN NEW YORK, I MIGHT WONDER IF HE WAS RUNNING ILLEGAL ALIENS AS A SIDE LINE OUT OF CUBA !....THE COAST GUARD REQUIRES 2 FIRE EXTINGUISHERS FOR THIS SIZE BOAT................I GOT 7.......THE LIST CONTINUES.......AND CONTINUES.....AND CONTINUES

NOTE THIS!

NO-ONE IS EXEMPT FROM

THIS DYSFUNCTION!

         MY LOVING BRIDE'S REACTION TO THIS WHOLE QUEST IS
         GRAPHICALLY REPRESENTED IN THE BIBLE WHEN GOD CAST SATAN FROM HEAVEN INTO THE NETHER REGIONS AND A
         "CALL ME WHEN YOU GET THERE! "
         THE FIRST THING I FOUND IN TORONTO WAS A" PIER 1 "( A FAVOURITE OF MINE FOR UNIQUE SMILE CREATORS)
         MAHOGANY CHARGER PLATES WITH COLOUR CO-ORDINATED
         PLACE MATS AND CONTRASTING NAPKINS WITH THEIR SIMPLE
         WHITE CHINA AND A FULL SET OF FOREST GREEN ACCENTED CUTLERY SET FOR 8...........MATCHING TOWELS, OF COURSE AND A
         LOVELY BASKET TO HOLD THEM ALL AS WE DINE ALFRESCO IN THE COCKPIT WATCHING THE SUN SET IN THE AEGEAN SEA.........
         THEN KEN HUCHERSON CALLED TO VERIFY HIS ARRIVAL TIME AND REQUESTED ONLY " A NICE PLACE TO SLEEP WITH A BLANKET AND A PILLOW FOR HIS HEAD"

         AS THE RACERS KNOW
"IF YOU OWN MORE THAN 1 SET OF SAILS,
YOU NO LONGER OWN A V-BERTH! "

         THE OTHER


'REST AREAS"  I REFER TO AS " COFFINS"................................PERHAPS SMALLER
         ANYWAY, I TOLD KEN THAT IF HE WERE TO LEAVE OUT THE WORD   "NICE" IN HIS ACCOMMODATION REQUEST, ALL WOULD BE JUST FINE.
         THEN I WENT OUT AND PURCHASED BOTH A PILLOW AND A DUVET.........ADMITTEDLY THINKING OF SOME RECONCILIATION
         BETWEEN GOD AND SATAN AND THE V-BERTH.

          
WE NOW, GO TO THE THIRD SIDE OF THE EQUATION

         " THE VOYAGING SHARK"

         THIS CONFIGURATION CARRIES FEW IF ANY FENDERS...THERE IS NOTHING TO HIT IN THE ATLANTIC THAT IS GOING TO ALLOW YOU TO EXIST THE COLLISION ANYWAY...........YOU HAVE A $400 SURVIVAL SUIT AND AN EPIRB STRAPPED TO YOUR NECK THAT YOU CONSTANTLY LIVE IN AND ALWAYS WITHIN REACH IS YOUR OVERBOARD BAG...........$800 DOLLARS OF WATERMAKER........$350
         OF FIRST AID CHEMICALS, DRUGS AND DEVICES RIGHT DOWN TO STICKS AND DUCT TAPE IF YOU BREAK SOMETHING

         ALL LINES ARE TIED TO THE HAND-HOLDS INSTANTLY AVAILABLE.............YOU ARE NEVER ABLE TO SEPARATE YOURSELF FROM THE BOAT BECAUSE OF THE SURVIVAL SUIT AND THE SAFETY HARNESS....................YES, THERE IS A SPARE IF I NEED IT

                 FROM HERE ON, IT IS THE SEA AND ME AS  I SIT AND WAIT FOR KEN"S ARRIVAL TOMORROW. THE SUN IS GOING DOWN AND I
         INTEND TO GET VERY DRUNK TONIGHT!

TOMORROW
STARTS A WHOLE
NEW LIFE STYLE
TWO CHOICES

"NO GUTS, NO GLORY
OR
"STUPID IS AS STUPID DOES"

         I HAVE AT  LEAST 20 MORE PAGES TO COME

                 BILL, KEEP IN TOUCH